A change in plans...

So, I had my own plan in mind about what to write today.....We always have our "own" agenda planned & then I find so often God changes it to His agenda! I was going to write about distractions in our lives, but alas during my devotion time I read this writing by Oswald Chambers and thought this was much better. I hope it speaks to you like it did to me...

"We must continually remind ourselves of the purpose of life. We are not destined to happiness, nor to health, but to holiness. Today we have far too many desires and interests, and our lives are being consumed and wasted by them. May of them may be right, noble, and good, and may later be fulfilled, but in the meantime God must cause their importance to us to decrease. The only thing that truly matters is whether a person will accept the God who will make him holy. At all costs, a person must have the right relationship with God.

Do I believe I need to be holy? Do I believe that God can come into me and make me holy? If through your preaching you convince me that I am unholy, I then resent you preaching. The preaching of the gospel awakens an intense resentment because it is designed to reveal my unholiness, but it also awakens an intense yearning and desire within me. God has only one intended destiny for mankind - holiness. His goal is to produce saints. God is not some eternal blessing-machine for people to use, and He did not come to save us out of pity - He came to save us because he created us to be holy. Atonement through the Cross of Christ means that God can put me back into perfect oneness with Himself through the death of Jesus Christ, without a trace of anything coming between us any longer.

Never tolerate, because of sympathy for yourself or for others, any practice that is not in keeping with a holy God. Holiness means absolute purity for your walk before God, the words coming from your mouth, and every thought in your mind - placing every detail of your life under the scrutiny of God Himself. Holiness is not simply what God gives me, but what God has given me this is being exhibited in my life."

Brothers....

Joshua & Abram...... 2 of the most amazing brothers any person could have & I yet again find myself thankful for them in my life! They bring me laughter, love, and sweet joy! I would not be who I am without them and my life is much fuller because of their love. They have loved me for as long as I can remember, they love my husband and took him in as another brother, and love my children as if they were their own. They are a true blessing.

I remember when my brother Joshua went off to college and I never knew how much your heart could hurt at missing some one so dearly. You see, Joshua is only 2 years younger than me and he was my best friend and buddy growing up. We did everything together & where you found Earen...you found Joshua and vice versa. He's now a grown man and making a wonderful life for his own and I'm so glad he's back home with us and apart of so much that we do.

Last week we all sent my younger brother Abram off to college. Even not being around for Abram as much, the heart still aches and hurts at missing him. You see, I'm 13 years older than Abram and he has just been a delight to have! My parents long ago felt like someone was missing from our lives and I'm so thankful they decided to try one more time. It was a step of faith and trust in the Lord as I have a handicapped sister who was born years before Abram, so going forward to "try again" was a moment of complete trust in the Lord and has become a lifetime of total dependence on Him.

I watched as Abram crossed that stage to graduate from highschool this last May and I can't express my feelings of complete pride in him. To watch the man he's grown up to be and the man of integrity & passion for the Lord at that. I watched his first steps, his first words, his first school days, his first baseball games, his first sledding moment in the snow, his first basketball game, his first girlfriend...I was there for so much of it. It's almost as if he's my own. I guess in a way, he is my own...he's my own & dear brother.

My brothers...what would I do without them....they are a huge piece of who I am and my heart is filled with complete joy.

Little hands...

A moment passes and I sweetly see the smile of my Levi. His tiny hands..his tiny feet. The way his tummy moves up & down as is the breathe of life in him. The way he tries to fit those fingers in his mouth & can't figure out how to open his fist. The way in which he simply realizes he has hands and admires them so. The joy is his face as he smiles to light up a distant room. The tiny body that lies against my chest and our hearts rest close to each other. The coos and laugh that are beginning to mutter so few, but there. The love I glance at in his eyes as he takes a moment from nursing to fit in a smile. The little hand that lays on my chest in complete comfort - grabbing on to me as if to say "you're my everything."

I wonder what Mary thought knowing she bore the Son of God. I wonder what she thought as she gazed at her son lying fast asleep, not knowing the road ahead for her precious son. I wonder how her heart felt as she gazed upon her Son's tiny hands only to one day know the piercing that would cause him to give his life for us. Can you imagine her love...not only for her Son, but for us. Not realizing that some day, those tiny hands would never be the same again.....