My 4 year old son was drowning at the pool this past weekend. To this day the image still haunts my mind as I see my little man gasping for air and struggling to come to the surface. While holding on to my younger 2 year old son, I turned for one moment and my 4 year old slipped from the step he had been standing on, to the deep end that caused him to fight for life. Since I was trying to keep my 2 year old above water I screamed out my husband's name & in a split second he was there, pulling Benjamin out of the water. Funny how the life guard was just sitting calmly along with another grown man right in the hot tub. Come on people, my son was drowning!!
As I've been haunted by this image for days now and I realize how the Lord protects our little ones and watches over them completely & I'm SO thankful. I sometimes feel like I'm drowning in the responsibilities and things of this life. I can't get above water & I'm grasping for air. In our drowning the Lord is desiring for us to yell for Him to save us. For others might be sitting around and watching us because ultimately the Lord is the only one who can be our Savior. The Lord desires for us to call on His name in HELP! I realized that Benjamin's Daddy came to the rescue and grabbed him from a moment of panic. I yelled my husband's name & he was there, without hesitation. That's what the Lord wants to be for us. We might be drowning in this life, but the Lord is ready to grab us from the waters that at times can overtake us. It's ONLY the Heavenly Father that can save & rescue us. He wants to help us in every situation of life.
For I yelled out my husband's name to save my son while I was unable...and Benjamin's father saved him. For those of us who call out on the name of Jesus and "scream" for his help, He will save us.
Romans 10:13
"For everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved."
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
Happy Mother's Day...
The end is in sight...and I can't believe it. My oldest son is almost a first grader. Where did his first school year go as it was flying by! I listen to him tell me all the things he's learning at school and where I've gone wrong in my own opinions about things (hmm...who's the adult here?). I listen as he quotes me long scripture verses he's had to learn and wonder..when's the last time I memorized a verse. I've watched him make new friends & praise God at the love he has for his new buddies. I've marveled at his mind and what a sponge it is as he's learning more than I ever thought possible at this age....And pride indwells within.
I think of my children all the time, but Mother's Day is approaching this weekend and I think even more about them and the honor I feel in being their Mama. I marvel as it seems like just yesterday that I started this journey with having my precious children - training & teaching them. But what even touches me deeper is the fact of how much they've taught ME. As mom's we know that when you have children life no longer becomes about you - for you lay your life aside for the love of a little heart. But in that laying aside of myself I find that an immense part of me grows - so self dies and eternal value flourishes. And all through my little loves....
So, I watch as my children grow and change & marvel at the Lord's faithfulness in my life. Being eternally grateful that I'm a Mama, for I was loved by one who put self aside for me and now it's my turn to be a model of her undying love for me.
Happy Mother's Day to all you Mamas out there!
I think of my children all the time, but Mother's Day is approaching this weekend and I think even more about them and the honor I feel in being their Mama. I marvel as it seems like just yesterday that I started this journey with having my precious children - training & teaching them. But what even touches me deeper is the fact of how much they've taught ME. As mom's we know that when you have children life no longer becomes about you - for you lay your life aside for the love of a little heart. But in that laying aside of myself I find that an immense part of me grows - so self dies and eternal value flourishes. And all through my little loves....
So, I watch as my children grow and change & marvel at the Lord's faithfulness in my life. Being eternally grateful that I'm a Mama, for I was loved by one who put self aside for me and now it's my turn to be a model of her undying love for me.
Happy Mother's Day to all you Mamas out there!
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
Self-control
Have you ever realized how much of your life is about "self"? So many things we do and motives we have are really indulged in how it will affect us. I recently have been extremely convicted about this in my life, realizing so many areas and my lack of self control.
Galatians 5: 22-23
"But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control."
As believers we don't often view a lack of self-control as sin....at least I didn't view it much that way until recently. For my frequent readers you know that I struggle with weight issues, have all my life. In the past few months I've really desired a break through in this area and a victory over a battle that has been mine for so long. What I realized though is that all my life I wanted to lose weight to look better on the outside and yes, yes...ultimately be healthy & take care of this body God had given me, but pridefully I wanted to look good! I think as the human race we can all relate. It wasn't until a rash broke out on my body after having strep throat & taking awhile to go away that the Lord started to work in me through this, or I should say I started to listen to what God wanted to teach me in this area. You see, it's not about the outward appearance but the eternal motives that God wanted to work on, but all I could get focused on was losing weight to look good and I was failing every time.
So, here I was...a fun rash all over and still not losing weight and I went into a period of anguish and questioning. Why would God allow a double whammy into an area that He knows is already difficult for me? But then my sweet Lord revealed Himself in a way I hadn't seen before. He spoke to my heart allowing me to realize that it wasn't about will power, or losing weight, or being healthy, or ultimately trying to do everything in my own strength...it was about addressing the sin in my life of my lack of self-control. Do I have self control even in indulging in 2 or 3 helpings of what I might consider healthy/good food? Does everything I put into my mouth bring glory to Him? Do I have self-control in every area of my life? Does everything I do bring glory to Him?
Self-control is a by product of having the Holy Spirit dwell inside me and that comes only by accepting Christ into my life and surrendering it to Him. We can not do anything other than through the power of the Holy Spirit. Oh, we might attempt it and "think" we've succeeded but we haven't because self is glorified or we eventually fail. Realizing the fact that I don't go into eating and exercise to look good but to address the sin in my life in not having self control and the fact that I desire to surrender every part of my heart and life to Him, not just my selected sins.
Taking up my cross daily....it's a daily & sometimes moment by moment journey for me. For truly this heart of mine desires Him and Him alone...I am nothing-He is everything and all I desire is more of Him. Self-control....putting aside self to glorify Him.
Galatians 5: 22-23
"But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control."
As believers we don't often view a lack of self-control as sin....at least I didn't view it much that way until recently. For my frequent readers you know that I struggle with weight issues, have all my life. In the past few months I've really desired a break through in this area and a victory over a battle that has been mine for so long. What I realized though is that all my life I wanted to lose weight to look better on the outside and yes, yes...ultimately be healthy & take care of this body God had given me, but pridefully I wanted to look good! I think as the human race we can all relate. It wasn't until a rash broke out on my body after having strep throat & taking awhile to go away that the Lord started to work in me through this, or I should say I started to listen to what God wanted to teach me in this area. You see, it's not about the outward appearance but the eternal motives that God wanted to work on, but all I could get focused on was losing weight to look good and I was failing every time.
So, here I was...a fun rash all over and still not losing weight and I went into a period of anguish and questioning. Why would God allow a double whammy into an area that He knows is already difficult for me? But then my sweet Lord revealed Himself in a way I hadn't seen before. He spoke to my heart allowing me to realize that it wasn't about will power, or losing weight, or being healthy, or ultimately trying to do everything in my own strength...it was about addressing the sin in my life of my lack of self-control. Do I have self control even in indulging in 2 or 3 helpings of what I might consider healthy/good food? Does everything I put into my mouth bring glory to Him? Do I have self-control in every area of my life? Does everything I do bring glory to Him?
Self-control is a by product of having the Holy Spirit dwell inside me and that comes only by accepting Christ into my life and surrendering it to Him. We can not do anything other than through the power of the Holy Spirit. Oh, we might attempt it and "think" we've succeeded but we haven't because self is glorified or we eventually fail. Realizing the fact that I don't go into eating and exercise to look good but to address the sin in my life in not having self control and the fact that I desire to surrender every part of my heart and life to Him, not just my selected sins.
Taking up my cross daily....it's a daily & sometimes moment by moment journey for me. For truly this heart of mine desires Him and Him alone...I am nothing-He is everything and all I desire is more of Him. Self-control....putting aside self to glorify Him.
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