Sunday, March 30, 2008

A delightful day!

This past weekend my Mama & I went to our local mall here & attended what they call "The Trend Show" at Nordstroms. People, this is MY THING! I look forward to it, I count down the days, I love it! I honestly would love to work it myself! You pay a small fee of $15 and you book a makeover with your preferred makeup counter and it's an amazing fun, girly day!

Here's how my day looked....

5:45am - Wake up to get ready for the day. I had to get ready before waking up Levi to feed him at 6:30am in order to be at the mall at 8am.

7:20am - Leave for the mall only to arrive and there's already a line of ladies waiting. Oh, & wait...there are tables set up for us to have coffee or tea while waiting...high class ladies, high class! :-)

7:40am - Put Levi in the stroller, close the door only to realize that I locked my keys and purse in the car. RATS! My sweet husband gets in the car, loads up the boys & comes to unlock the car.

8am - Doors open & we are handed a darling pink tote bag filled with a croissant & strawberries for breakfast, along with a sample of lip gloss and a few brochures, and a bottle of water.

8:30am - The fashion show starts with darling dresses being modeled but way too short! Proceeded by many of the makeup representatives for Bobbi Brown, MAC, Clinique, Laura Mercier, NARS, and many more showing us some of their great products along with give-a-ways...that I didn't win!

10am - Show finishes & the mad dash of women to the level below where you must get to the counters for the free offers with purchase before they run out. I could have done this & run over women with my stroller, but decided to contain myself!

10:05am - We proceed to the Fushion counter in which they are featuring their lip plumper. I try on so many colors that by the end of my time I think my lips must have been huge! I bought some, but returned it before the day had finished because of my favorite purchases at the "other" counter.

10:45am - Proceed to "Women's Lounge" (the fancy name Nordstorm uses for bathroom) to feed Levi.

11am....The time has come...the moment I've waited for, for over a month...MY MAKEOVER! Of course I chose my favorite makeup...Bobbi Brown. Love her stuff & the "other" stuff I bought! Bought a lip gloss palate & some eyeliner ink. Awesome!

12 - My mom gets her makeover & looks just stunning! She too loves Bobbi Brown.

1pm - Lunch at Cheesecake favorite restaurant.

3pm - Head home after a amazingly, delightful day with my Mama. We talk about girl things, and shared what the Lord had been doing in our lives and it was exactly what I needed....exactly. Days like this are few & far between in my life right now and so I cherish them. One-on-one time with my Mama is a treasured gift to me...I could have basked in it's presence all day....I was refreshed and ready to return to my home and love on the gifts that awaited me there.

Friday, March 28, 2008

Stressful darts...

This man is amazing....a gift to me from the I didn't deserve. This man is my husband.

I realized something about myself the other day & it's something I probably already knew, but it hit me again in all its ugly form. We decided Tuesday evening to go to a local, professional, portrait studio and have some nice pictures taken of our family and the boys, seeing as Benjamin was 7 months old the last time we had this done...he's now 3. So, my husband comes home from work and I'm already stressing out....Seriously, it feels like it took me all day to prepare for this. Washing the Easter outfits because they would match yet they were dirty from Easter. Then, realizing that they needed to be ironed..I never iron the boy's clothes. Then making sure my clothes were ready and taking the time to curl my hair during nap times. It was a whole day project!!

My husband arrived home and things were going well and I could feel myself getting a little up tight, but I was doing ok.....until we decided to bring the portable DVD player to entertain our boys while we looked at the 93 pictures they took. Caleb, my oldest had a melt down when he didn't get to pick which movie we took with us....then for me, the stress and frustration exploded! "We don't have time for this....You mess up your hair because you're throwing a fit & I'll be so upset with you! Don't fall asleep in the car....Dan, could you have helped me more?...Good thing I dressed them all & brushed their hair, huh honey?"

Arrows...darts....firey words...all from my heart. I lash out when I'm stressed and I usually lash out at my kids and Dan because well...they are there. Here's where I get back to my husband being just amazing....He will just listen and chooses not to lash back at me. He shows me love and tenderness because he knows I'm stressed and that it really has nothing to do with him. For his love is unconditional....

As I was walking out of the store later that evening this verse from the Word came to my mind... "From the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks." My heart must be so dark and yucky at times and I had to immediately seek the forgiveness of my kids, Dan, and the Lord. I walked away asking the Lord what I can do to fill my heart with things constantly of the Lord so that when I'm in a situation like that, out of my mouth flows good because my heart is in abundance from the Lord.

The answer is right there for me always....right in front of my face...the Word. Saturating myself with His word will rid the ugly inside of me. A little self control would then flow from that and the peace of God flowing through my words would then occur. In the meantime and as I'm learning, I don't want to put little holes in my families heart with my words because there's forgiveness but just like a fence, you hammer a nail in it & you can pull that nail out, but the hole will always be there.....I'm thankful for the holes that were placed in Jesus hands....for the sacrifice He made so that I can start again from moment to moment and the forgiveness and love I find in Him.

Dan, I love you...thank you for loving me no matter what. I promise, I'm working on this in my life. You are truly amazing... To my little sweet loves....thank you for forgiving me without hesitation...I love you.

Monday, March 24, 2008

What a love....

I carry one in my arms and I walk behind two other little bodies as pride and unimaginable love swells inside as I realize how truly blessed I am. My babies are becoming little day they will be grown men.

It was my first time to dress them each alike. I was so excited as I stumbled upon 3 little shirts that matched and well hey, I don't have girls so I'm going to dress up my boys! We walked into church and as I admired my three little men tears almost swelled up in my eyes. They have my heart and I realized they have me wrapped around their little fingers. I never knew love for little hearts could feel this way....I am so very, very proud. The sweetness of the Lord is right before me every day through these little boys...May their lives be a sweet sound to You and may their boldness for You astound & bring many to your Kingdom.

Thursday, March 20, 2008

The Stillness through Simplicity....

"....We struggle to find a quiet, spiritual center. And even more so to understand what God means when He says, 'Be still...'

Stillness must be something deeper, more subtle, more encompassing than I previously thought. It must center more on inner sources and less on outer ones. It must not be dependent upon carefree circumstances, serene surroundings, or lack of children underfoot. It's not even a product of quiet or inactivity. In fact, we have to be able to find it in the middle of chaos.....We can start this by making radical choices in favor of simplicity."

These quotes come from a book I picked up at my mom's house called "Still Life" by Mary Jenson. Simplicity is the word I feel that the Lord gave me the first part of this year. I have cut so much out of my schedule this year. For one, it's easier...but the moments I would have missed because of rushing off, or the peace that I needed inside for a bit would have passed me by.

Stillness...simplicity....we almost feel guilty just saying the words. We aren't utilizing what we should be. We aren't doing what we should be doing at church or volunteering somewhere or involved in a ministry. And for me, the guilt sets in. Those things in themselves are not bad by any means, but I strongly feel that for me when they get in the way of the calling the Lord has given me of making a home filled with the presence of the Lord, loving and respecting my husband, caring and training with love for my children....then we lose the simplicity and the stillness to hear Him.

What greater joy would there be than to be still and simple in the presence of the Lord. The chaos will be there and even then I sometimes don't like to call my life chaos, but little gifts given to me that require me to be busy! :-)

It's the's the heart that finds stillness, but in order to find that stillness, I've had to find simplicity. To find that Breathe of Fresh Air that saturates my entirety that only God can do. To rest....

Psalm 91: 1-2
"Those who live in the shelter of the Most High will find rest in the shadow of the Almighty. This I declare about the Lord, He alone is my refuge, my place of safety, he is my God, and I trust him..."

Wednesday, March 19, 2008


Last night we were invited to my family's house for a passover dinner. It was a celebration of all that Christ has done for us & a rememberance of how the Lord prevailed in victory.

My family has always been the fun and goofy type & we love it! We arrive to my parent's house with sandals on, a backpack, a walking stick...only to be greeted by my parents & grandparents wearing this same outfit. According to Exodus 12:11...we were ready to leave in a hurry like the Israelites....a symbolism of being ready for Christ's return! Can I just say that the boys LOVED it! My mom made up pictures of Moses & Pharaoh & every time we would read "Let my people go!"...they would hold up Moses' picture. Every time we would read "no"...they held up Pharaoh's picture. We all were assigned a verse to read of the plagues that occurred. We then put red paper over the door posts of the dining room area in representation of the blood of the lamb - to save us from the angel of death that would pass over...we were safe...We are forever safe because of what Christ did for us on the cross. Praise the Lord!!

We ate lamb (pork chops), and unleavened bread (pita bread), and bitter herbs (peas, corn, green beans, & salad). It was a wonderful meal followed by a special time of communion...remembering the LAMB OF GOD who became the sacrifice for us so that we no longer have to slaughter the lamb. So much symbolism.

After everything was finished we realized how much our boys had remained still at the table, enjoying what happened. They were learning...they were now remembering with us.

Growing up we did this as kids, but in kid fashion (especially when older) we thought it was fun but might think we were a little goofy & yet enjoy it. As adults, my husband & I were so appreciative of all the work my mom had gone through to make this evening happen...the desire to allow us remember - my parent's heart to teach us the things of the Lord. So, as funny as we might have looked with our outfits...we cherished that moment. Because those are the most wonderful memories I have as a kid growing up and now I have these memories with my own kids. Thank you Mama...we thoroughly enjoyed it and so treasure your heart for the Lord and reminding us during this season of all He's done for us.

Monday, March 17, 2008


This is a week of mixed emotions.....on one hand we know in a few days what Jesus had to face so many years ago. Torture, pain, sacrifice, death.....All for us. On the other hand it's one of extreme joy as we rejoice that pain has no victory and our Lord is risen from the dead! Hallelujah!!

In our home we refer to Easter as Resurrection Sunday. We have a Passover dinner earlier in the week to remind us of what happened so many, many years ago. To remind us to be prepared, for His return is soon! We do all the fun hiding of candy around our house (I know, adventurous!) and the dying of the eggs. But, we try to really focus on the gift the Lord gave us so many, many years ago through this week of pain & victory. He is Risen! He has conquered death! We are victorous through Him! It is complete! Nothing we ever can "do" will ever change what He's already accomplished for us through the's finished! The work has already been done, through Christ!! Can I say again....Hallelujah!

So, as we walk through another week of remembering all that Christ did for us so many years ago, I'm reminded of that day 28 years ago when I bowed my head and prayed with my mama to accept Christ into my heart as my Savior. To surrender to what is now my Jesus....who gave everything up for me. He went through it all so that I never would....What a precious gift and I rejoice because His victory is now mine! My life is now His and I say with loud rejoicing....HE IS RISEN!!

Sunday, March 16, 2008

Staying home...

A few weeks ago a dear friend of mine called me and asked what I had been up to. I felt my body language change assuming she could see me over the phone as I took a big sigh and slumped my body into the couch to say..."You know what, we honestly just stay home." Life is easier and less stressful for us all if we just stay home. Life is busy here at home but from what I hear, it only gets busier as the children enter the years of school. That's what life is going to look like for us next year, so for now...we just stay home.

I've thought about this over the weeks and have found myself saying this to many friends since then that have asked me how I've been. This life is drastically different from our life before children. My husband and I like to be on the go. When we both got home from work, we'd go see movies, go shopping, and sometimes we would just stay snuggled up on the couch. Now it's completely different for us and we take a moment to stop and think about what all it involves before we go out with 3 boys under the age of 5.

But, we love has become our resting place...our life of calm and regular routine. It has become our shelter from the storm, our hiding place, our comfort, our place of "being who we are." Who needs movies when we have entertainment right here with the love and laughter of a treasured thing called family. I think God designed it that way....

I think God desires us to "just stay home" with Him. To hide in His shelter, to rest in His arms, to find the comfort and love of a Savior who truly gave His life for us. I've really learned lately the contentment that comes in my home and the rest of spirit that I find here. My eternal Home though is where I truly desire to drench myself with nothing but Him and then tell a friend in a phone conversation that I "just stay Home" with Him even in the everyday.

Thursday, March 13, 2008

My sweet boy....

A touch of love from Above, was the day you were born. You came into our lives 3 years ago today and from the moment you were inside of me, my heart was yours.

Your smile that saturates my heart until all around me melts away....

Your sweet words that touch me in a way that only a 3 year old can do....

The way you love basketball and call me down to your bed to see all your "pretend" turtles....

The way you've fought for the honor of your older brother & I wonder who's the older one...

The kiss and hug that you give me with unreserved passion...

The way you challenge my heart to seek the Lord and pursue how He wants to teach me things through you....

Benjamin, you touch me deeply and as I look at your life these past 3 years, I am so thankful to the Lord for the beautiful life He gave us in you. As my fear for your health rose several times when you were little & hospitalized, I clung to the Lord and trusted that He loves you far more than I ever can...and in that is true surrender. The Lord has given us the privilege of raising you and I'm honored to be your Mama...

We love you dearly my sweet, sweet boy. Happy Birthday....

Saturday, March 8, 2008

Time...'s an interesting thing. I personally sometimes wonder how I have the time to blog myself and read all of your amazing blogs....thus the reason I'm delayed in writing & reading so often.

This past week I didn't have access to the internet world. As I took a break from this technology I realized how much of a hold it on my life and how much of a priority it had become to me. Low and behold I realized my house was cleaner, I had time to read the Word, I had time to spend with my boys...I had more time....

What things in my life have so much control over me that it interferes with what's most important? As I backed away from this internet world I realized that it's a wonderful thing, but it had been taking too much of me....too much of me away from what's so much more important. So, as much as I love reading your blogs and sharing our lives together I am taking this chance to really be careful as to when I open this world and take away from my own world.....

I love writing, so you're not getting rid of me that easy, but I challenge you all to see what happens when you take a week break....

Sunday, March 2, 2008

Taking a break...

To my friends in the blog world.......

I will be just taking a little break from blogging & reading blogs for this week, March 3rd (my 1/2 birthday! HA!) through March 7th. I'll be back Saturday, March 8th.

I will miss you all but look forward to catching up with you on the 8th!