I don't think we realize how much of our emotions and feelings are our own choices. I have been recently reminded of this so sweetly by the Lord and it's been a lesson in learning yet again.
Not too long ago I had a situation come up with a friend that upset & frustrated me. It wasn't a huge ordeal or something that I felt really even warranted talking about with this individual but needless to say it started eating at me & I found myself becoming a bit bitter. It wasn't too long after this, I was sitting in church listening ever so intently (can you do that while nursing a 6month old in the nursing mother's room amidst other distractions?) and this is what I heard..."You know, I really feel like bitterness is our own choice." That one sentence convicted my heart yet again & led to a whole string of thoughts about the choices that we make in living with our emotions and feelings. Now, we as women do have extra hormones that like to kick in here & there and honestly, sometimes our feelings are definitely warranted, but it's what happens from there.
So, every time I thought about this situation with my friend I would stop those thoughts (or at least try to) dead in their tracks and say, "I choose to not be bitter or upset." As I began this process and started thinking so much about what our pastor said, I realized this...we truly do have a choice in how we react & proceed with situations in our lives. In the situation with this friend, I could choose to continue playing the victim role and feeling sorry for myself & become bitter or I could choose to not let the enemy get a hold in this situation and choose to not be bitter & just go on. And you know what, letting it go takes so much less effort than continuing to hold on to it! There are situations in our lives that will definitely warrant us to working through them with friends, but instead of letting the person or situation take control of us, what if we laid it at the foot of the cross and let the Lord handle it?!
This life is sometimes hard...we have struggles, hardships, ups and downs with friends, and many other things, but what I've learned is this....how am I going to choose to respond? What choice am I making? My circumstances might not be ideal to what I'd like right now, but you know, I choose JOY! I might be frustrated at a friend but you know what, I choose to forgive and not be bitter! I'm beyond tired & had a rough day, but you know what, I choose to find my strength in Him & press on.
I challenge you to look at your life and evaluate what choices you are making in how you feel about your life & situations. It's all easier said than done when you have an outside view, but I've been right there and understand the battle within...just like anything we have a choice. John 10:10 says, "The thief (satan) does not come except to steal, and to kill, and to destroy. I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly." Don't let him steal your joy...steal your friendships, steal your life.....Make that choice.
Now, remind me of this again when I am choosing the wrong emotions.....:-)
8 comments:
Look at you and Renee, all in bloggy sync. :) Such wise words, my friend. I so appreciate reading this and definitely need to bookmark it or something.
Hugs and love! I'll tag you in phone tag here soon.
My pastor always says when you have bitterness in your heart toward someone they are your master. It is so true. As we say here in the south - that's easy talking, but tough living. It is easier said than done to forgive and choose to let bitterness go. I tend to hold on to wrongs (maybe not outwardly, but inwardly). Great post.
I am thinking that you and Tara should totally move to Tennessee. We all need to get together in person and solve the problems of the world! hahahahaha
I so agree and what a GREAT reminder about WHAT to choose for today! What a breath of fresh air you are, Earen. =)
I agree wholeheartedly and struggle with this myself. I so easily let Satan get in on my thoughts and oftentimes he will make a mountain out of a molehill...and I let him. Aargh!
I like what Bethanne's pastor says "when you have bitterness in your heart toward someone they are your master."
Also, I am mortified to say I have been pronouncing YOUR name wrong in my head. I feel like such a dummy. I was pronouncing it Ear-en. So sorry! At least I wasn't calling you Earn. My name gets butchered, too. I didn't mention this one in my post, but I've actually been called Eliana before. Wha??
So true my friend. My biggest frustrations come from not getting what I want. "why did they spill that after I just mopped the floor?" or "why won't the just go to bed?" None of those things catches God by surprise so why do I get so easily frustrated by these things?
Bitterness---I've seen so many friendships, good friendships destroyed b/c they've allowed the roots to grow so deep they couldn't pull it out. I'm glad to see you making the wiser choice.
Aggghhh Earen! Why did you have to bring this up, I am so (dis)content stewing in my bitterness.
Holding on to it guards me from any more hurt, keeps me from being vulnerable, BUT makes it impossible for me to receive love from this person.
Is it obvious i am struggling with this myself?
Come to Ca., sit with, and encourage me, we'll have coffee in Christmas mugs :-)
Did you write this before you IM'd me yesterday? I didn't check out your blog yesterday, but it was kind of neat to check it out today, and see the same thing that you were encouraging me with. This must be on your heart recently.
And what a simple, yet powerful thing to write about. Choosing joy. It sounds so simple...but the rewards are incredible...
This is a wonderful post. WONDERFUL. I need to learn to choose joy, and not let the enemy steal it from me. Thanks for the reminder!! (And reinforcing what you said yesterday!)
This is a great post - love it! I love what Bethanne said about bitterness being your master - it was my master for one person for almost 8 years. 8 years - come on but I felt intitled and like Denise said I was guarding my heart from more hurt but once I let it go - what a weight lifted off my shoulders. This is definitely something I have struggled with more with some people than others. I choose the freedom and the joy! Thanks so much for sharing your heart. Maybe we need to have a bloggy support group to help out with this area :o)
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