I walk back into my home this morning and it's a bit more quiet...
Tears swelling up in my eyes...
I'm letting you go a little bit more today dear one...
You're off to a world that can be cruel and disheartening....
I won't be there when you fall down & scrape your knee, kissing it as I always do...
I won't be there from moment to moment and see your eyes light up at new ideas & thoughts...
I won't be there to experience every detail like I have been for the last 4 1/2 years....
It's way harder today than I thought it would be...
Letting you go a little bit more from my hands and committing you even more into His...
I know though that you'll love every moment of learning & experiencing new things...
But for every moment I can't be there, I know He always is...
For every cruel word or moment with another, I know He'll comfort you...
For every scrape you experience, He'll be there to wipe your tears...
May the Lord keep you under His wings and may know how much I already miss you...
I love you my sweet Caleb....
6 comments:
Thank you for leaving such a sweet comment on my blog. I am so excited that more and more people are finding me through other people. And you are right... blogging is so addictive. I read friends of friends of friends blogs all the time. It's so great hearing how happy people are. And even just reading a few of your posts, I instantly have such a great feeling about you. You have such a lovely spirit about you. Even though I don't know you, I imagine you smiling a lot :)
Sigh...
I can't imagine what it will be like when Becca heads off to school (even if it's preschool). It will be hard to know that I won't be there for her all the time. That I'm trusting her to someone else's care.
But what an encouraging outlook you have! We're not just handing them over to another person, we're placing them in God's hands for safekeeping!
Thank you for the sweet reminder! Love you!
You said what every mom's heart feels on that first day that you entrust your child to someone else's care. It's bittersweet to part of you still wants to hang on, even though they are right where you've been encouraging them to grow. *hugs*
My oldest is almost 13 now, and I can honestly say that as hard as it is to watch them sprout those wings, it does get "funner and funner" with time! I do feel twinges every once in awhile (like when I read your posts about those days when they are little!), but for the most part I am reveling in their "becoming." Just a word of encouragment... there is more beyond those sweet years than most of us ever dream of. So, enjoy - and be happy knowing it's just the beginning of a joyful journey! You're raising little people who will one day be your FRIENDS. God is so sweet to us to give us that opportunity to know these "friends" from conception!
And your worldview is deeply right and true. Keep reminding yourself of that! :) Jack's children's catechism says it well, Q:"Can you see God?" A: "No, but He ALWAYS sees me."
Jen
Last year, when my oldest started school, I cried like he was dying. I was totally beside myself and sad. It got better everyday. I still miss him (hes in 1st grade), but I dont mourn like I did the first month of kindergarten. Being a mom is so hard sometimes!
Earen,
Thanks for your comment. It is nice to know that we aren't alone in these things. It really is hard letting go. I love what you said about even if we are not there to comfort, God is. I'm so thankful for that.
I'm glad your little guy is adjusting well. We are in our third week of school now and my little guy is doing great.
It gets easier!
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